8.17.2008 Question from a 5 year old

Since I've come back from Japan I've dove back into work and straight into our school's summer camp program. It's a lot of extra work since we aren't provided with any materials but we are given complete "creative control". Basically pick a weekly theme and go from there.

Last week I chose to do the 5 food groups with my kindy class. Their food vocabulary is really good so I started to teach them the difference between fruit, vegetables, dairy, grain and meat. Mid-week I started the morning by showing them coloring pages I'd taken off the net and getting them to shout out which food group it is from. The kids have become naturally chatty which is awesome for an ESL class. So as I flashed the picture above one of my 5 year old students, who I've taught since he started learning English a couple years ago, tilted his head and with complete seriousness and curiosity asks "Teacher, that one is very stinky or very hot?" The absolute seriousness in his voice and "thirst for knowledge" on his face is what really killed me.

I nearly fell off my chair laughing followed by him and the other students. He didn't mean it as a joke but was pretty proud of himself after when I told the other teachers what he asked.

The image is from first-school, a really great resource for any kindy teachers out there.

Labels: ESL teaching, taipei

7.20.2008 In Japan!!! Why I love Taipei more still....

Monday night Han and I left Taipei for 21 days in Japan. We're lucky enough that Han has a (wonderful, beautiful, and cool) sister Uken who lives in Tokyo who is housing us for most of our stay. I find every day in Japan I'm constantly comparing things to Taiwan. I've always wondered if I could, or would want to live here . So far Japan seems to be better than Taiwan in about a million different ways. Strangely some of the reasons that make Japan "better" make me love Taiwan more. Maybe I could stand to live here for a year when Han eventually has to do his mandatory military service but I am pretty sure now Taiwan is home.

I'm not sure if I want or need to have the choice of 1000s of different vacuum cleaners in one building, or as many different kinds of toilets, watches, or cellphones. I love public transportation but having the train and subway system so interconnected creates this monster spiderweb that makes every day feel like I'm living in some kind of complex video game labyrinth. I have to find the right ticket booth for the right gates for the right trains and figure out whether the train or subway is cheaper or faster. Just to illustrate what I'm talking about here is the Taipei metro map:

Here are two different systems for Tokyo that don't even show all of the stations that belong to the Tokyo area:



Taipei's metro has 8 lines and 67 stations. Tokyo has 13 lines and 282 stations.

In all fairness Tokyo boasts a population of 12,790,000 to Taipei's 2,630,515 but that's just one more reason why I love Taipei more.

The malls are nearly as bad as the subway system with so many interconnected buildings and endless levels of stores for everything you could ever imagine and some things that you would never imagine (humping dog USB anyone?? note: Uken has one of these):



It's a love/hate relationship with me and the malls.

Something else I didn't expect is that Tokyo doesn't share Taipei's love of convenience stores. It's hard to make anyone believe how many convenience stores are in Taipei unless you've been there and I have a hard time believing there are any countries that rival it. Between 7-11s, Family Marts, Hi lifes, Nico Marts, and some more I'm sure that I'm forgetting I feel like there is a conveniences store for every 10 people in Taiwan. It's not weird to see a conveniences store next door to a rival convenience store with another across the street. Two 7-11s can sometimes be on opposite ends of the same blocks. According to Wikipedia there are 7000 7-Eleven locations in Taiwan giving it the 3 largest amount in the world... keep in mind that's ONLY 7-Eleven.

In comparison in Tokyo the convenience stores seem almost scarce but in place are vending machines EVERYWHERE. I still haven't seen any of the famous beer vending machines but Soda, juice, and cigarette vending machines are everywhere.



Oh and my last observation of something I don't like about Japan so far before I get into what I love. People smoke here, it seems a lot! I'm actually really surprised. I hadn't imagined this as a smoking culture. In my own life I've had less and less exposure to smoking and smokers. In high school it seemed like EVERYONE one smoked, and my closest group of friends and I, excluding a couple of people were the rare ones who didn't. Then as laws were passed to prohibit smoking in more and more places smoking almost became invisible. I guess not being into the clubs is part of the reason why I haven't been so exposed to it. In Taiwan it seems more similar to Canada, there are smokers but it seems on my beaten path,it's a much smaller percentage of the population. Rarely do I see smokers in front of buildings or in parks. Sometimes flying by on scooters (smoking + flame seems like a bad idea but I see it) and sometimes in smoking sections of cafes or restaurants. I actually saw a propane delivery man (on a scooter with propane strapped to the back) with a lit cigarette before we left Taiwan. Yikes.

Labels: Japan, relationships, taipei, Tokyo

2.17.2008 logic defying sighting

I exited 7/11 one morning this week and started on my way to work. As I was walking I noticed a blind woman walking in front of me. From what I could tell she was completely blind. She was walking slowly but efficiently with a cane like the one pictured above. Something was puzzling me and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Then the fog lifted and I noticed she was wearing high heels.

First of all high heels aren't easy to walk in. I can imagine being blind, and especially in Taiwan, where the roads are bad, people are pushy, and people are stupid enough to drive their scooters at high speed on the sidewalks that you would want to at all times ensure your physical safety and prevent yourself from falling however possible. Secondly, no matter what anyone says heels are NOT comfortable and there is absolutely no reason to wear them except for aesthetics.

I'm not trying to be politically incorrect here, I have a deaf sister and I'm sensitive about these things but I still found it baffling.

I told one of my co-workers the story and he chuckled with an "only in Taiwan" response and shared with me how when he was in the Philippines over the (lunar) New Year holidays he saw a Chinese girl walking down the beach with an umbrella and wearing stilettos on the sandy sandy beach.

My only guess is she wasn't completely blind but the way she was using the cane makes me she think she was, or it's just a simple desire of normalcy in someway?

Labels: Only in Asia, taipei, taiwan

2.05.2008 Shrimp fishing, one more thing I'm not good at...

... but at least I'm better than Han.

Unlike Andres shrimp fishing experience, Bubba would not be proud. Two hours spent shrimp fishing and all I caught were two shrimp... but the upside is that I caught two more shrimp than Han.

This Chinese New Year holiday has really stunk for me. First of all I'm not sitting on a beach getting a tan and a massage, second the weather is AWFUL... cold cold cold and rain rain rain. Even the mini heater isn't cutting it (there's no indoor heating in Taiwan for those of you who don't know). Lastly, this is the SHORTEST Chinese New Year holiday I've had in Taiwan and the first unpaid one. Typically I've gotten two weeks off but this one is a week and a few days. It's unpaid because now I work hourly instead of salary so that = no pay.

As if all of these things combined aren't reason enough to make someone feel sorry for themselves just when I was coming out of my last illness, the one I wrote about in the previous post, on the eve before my last half day of work before the holidays my body decided to explode on both ends. I got food poisoning. Without getting into the gory details I'll sum it up by saying it was volcanic food poisoning... I didn't know how I was going to make it to the hospital without a bag taped to my head and a diaper on my butt but thankfully I made it and spent the next 24 hours hooked up to an IV being stabbed by nurses whenever I started to make a retching noise... and needless to say missing my last day of work before the holiday. sigh.

So understandably (at least I hope) I've been miserable and kind of a princess. It's like I'm relapsing into culture shock because everything is annoying me and I find myself complaining about "Taiwan things" more than I usually do. Somewhere between me saying that this is the worst New Year holiday ever for me and me crying over my BBQ salmon last night Han caught on why I'm so miserable this week. So he launched his own mission to entertain me. Being the good boyfriend that he is and knowing how to keep me happy he made me try some things I've never tried before.

The first was snooker, which he's been dying to try. It took me about 5 minutes to hate it. As if it wasn't bad enough to instantly be the world's worst snooker player, we had to be surrounded by people who look like they've been playing since they were in diapers. I have no idea how long our one game took but if it's any gage one of the tables next to us was able to finish 4 sets in our 1. Oh well the good news is after playing snooker last night I was actually pretty good at pool tonight and didn't get bored of it as fast as I usually do (note: I'm convinced the only reason we played pool after fishing is so that Han could beat me at something again, because that's what he's used to)... regardless Han is going to have to find a new snooker partner because his pleas to play again aren't going to work on me.

Today was another miserable wet day and despite the weather Han took me out for a drive up a mountain close to the National Palace Museum. On our way up we noticed an indoor shrimp fishing place. I'd seen these before, both in passing, on tv, and mentioned on Andres blog last week but I'd never tried. Han asked if I'd be up for trying it on our way back down. Seeing as it was so wet and cold outside it seemed like a great idea.

I'm not sure what Han aspired to when we walked in but neither of us have fished for shrimp before, I'm pretty sure Han has never fished at all. We were geared up by the old men who worked there and away we went. I'm still blaming our lack of eye wear. We're both pretty blind but don't do anything about it. I wear contacts occasionally and Han wears nothing ever. I'm pretty sure if we'd been able to see our bob floaty thing we'd have had more success. In total I caught 2. It would've been 4 if 2 hadn't slipped off when I was swinging them in. Han had 2 or 3 that got away. The old guys tried to coach us but it didn't help. One of the men who refills the pool with shrimp threw a couple of live ones into my catch bag shaking his head. Sympathy shrimps.

When you finish fishing the fun doesn't stop there. You actually get to cook & eat what you catch. Seeing our poor catch of 2 fished out + 2 sympathy shrimps one of the men who worked at the place gave us 4 more sympathy shrimps to cook and helped us impale them, alive :(. Next we rolled them around in sea salt and put them in the BBQ. Han thought he beat me because he was able to get more sympathy shrimps than I did.

I never really found a big difference in sea salt and regular salt when I lived in Canada the way I did with freshly ground pepper vs regular but duuuude that salt was good and those shrimp were good!!!

I'm thoroughly convinced that if I wear my contacts next time I could be a shrimp fishing grand master like the young guy sitting next to me who caught 20!!!!! His line was on fire! To be truthful the ones I did catch, and almost caught, I didn't even realize were on the line until I pulled it in to check if the bait was still there. I fed more shrimps than I hooked :(

Oh well, it was surprisingly fun and way better than sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

I still can't believe that this place is open 24 hours. Seriously, who needs to catch shrimp at 4am???!!! and who would want to eat it then??!

Oh and for the record... getting back to the food poisoning. I wish I could chalk it up to some big gastronomical adventure in Taiwan like duck feet, or chicken hearts or something exciting but the truth of the matter is all I'd eaten all day was a sub from SUBWAY!!! To anyone living in Taipei I STRONGLY recommend that you don't eat at the Subway on Roosevelt Road Section 3 close to the intersection of Roosevelt & Xinhai. I've gotten a tiny bit sick there and I thought it was by chance and avoided the chicken after that. This time it wasn't even chicken. I'm suspecting the caesar sauce but I was SICK. Like I was sure I was going to die and if I didn't get help I was ready to jump out a window it was so bad. So yea... subway good, subway on roosevelt bad. Be careful. Go to Haas down the road close to Shida. Much safer bet.

Labels: gastronomical adventures, shrimp fishing, taipei, taiwan

1.12.2008 A blogless 2007, 2008 baby I'm back

2007 proved to be a real test of character for all aspects of my life. My love life, work life, Taiwan life all suffered some major ups and downs. And somewhere in the midst of it I stopped typing. It's really sad because of how much I really got out of my site, how it really kept me moving artistically, and how it kept Taiwan forever new and fresh for me.

At some point this site had regular traffic that scared me, a modest number of visits by some people's standards but much more than I ever expected to get and then I started hearing more and more about how people in Taiwan and their friends were looking at my site. That kind of ruined things for me. As cool as it was the original intent of writing about Taiwan at all was to amuse my family and friends back home as well as other Westerners. I hadn't really thought or dreamed that people living in Taiwan and seeing the same things I was seeing would be spending any time at my site. So I started to worry about everything I wanted to write about. "Too many people in Taiwan have written about this, why blog about something everyone else already has??", "Everyone has already seen this, why put a picture up of this, it'll be boring!!". bla bla bla



Aside from that working 44 hours a week before I went home this summer didn't even leave me with time to check my e-mail.

Now I'm a lot less busy and don't care so much about who's reading or why. I'm grateful for anyone who gives me their time. It's cool to know that people are there. First and foremost I write for myself and for my family. A kind of visual scrapbook since I'm so bad at keeping a written diary or photo album, and why bother?



So where have I been? I spent the summer home in Canada. It wasn't what it should have been, I suffered a major betrayal before heading home and it soured the whole visit for me. I spent way too much time alone and miserable. I'm sorry for the family and friends I didn't see and grateful to the ones who I did see and were able to put up with me.

Since I've been back in Taiwan I FINALLY started taking Chinese classes. It's incredibly embarrassing that I've been living in Taiwan more than 2 years and hadn't studied at all. According to another ex-pat I met this is a very "Canadian" thing to do. It made me cringe but at the same time I can't feel offended. It seems in Taiwan Canadians are at the butt end of the joke and are criticized and joked about for the same things we are guilty of joking and criticizing Americans for back home. There are some nice, wonderful, talented, and motivated Canadians in Taiwan but there are unfortunately a good number of thoughtless, drunk, greedy, horny jerks (male and female) too. I used to feel proud to tell people I was from Canada when I first came to Taiwan until I started meeting the kind of Canadians who will head to work to teach kindergarten kids still drunk from the night before. argh.



Unfortunately my work hours have picked up again so I haven't had as much time as I've wanted to again and I've had to drop the Chinese classes but I intend to start some 1 on 1 classes soon. Having Han has helped me "cheat" a lot and live a much richer life in Taiwan that I could've without him but I'm an independent girl and always have been so it's really important to me.

I'm sneaking up on my 3 year anniversary in Taiwan and with that I seem to have hit a new milestone which involves everyone I never thought would ever leave Taiwan leaving. It's been heartbreaking. Sure I've heard them say they were planning on leaving at some point but denial kicked in and I didn't believe it. It's another reason I've resolved to study Chinese harder. It's great to have other ex-pat friends but in a way I don't want to make anymore friends in the ex-pat community. It becomes too heartbreaking. Meanwhile, I feel like the only thing that's changed about me in 3 years is my hair and everyone back home is having babies, buying houses and cars, and getting married. Thankfully I still have a few friends and a big sister who is content to live outside the norm so I don't feel so weird.



So how about the new year? Han and I decided to brave the fireworks since we've heard this year will be the last year they do them off of 101. I've moved to the Xinhai area and there is a little field of grass we pass sometimes when we are driving towards 101. We decided to try to make it there on the scooter on new year night because it has the most clear and perfect view of 101. Seriously, anyone wanting to get a good shot of 101 should setup their tripod here. If I can figure out where it is on the map I'll post the google map location. I have no idea what the place is called. I'm sure it's called a park even though there is seriously nothing there but a big triangle of grass but even a 6 ping square of grass with a rock on it is a park with an official name in Taipei :).



We never ended up making it to the field. We were so deadlocked in traffic we couldn't move for almost 2 hours. We ended up about 10 meters away from it with the most clear and perfect view of 101 imaginable. I'm glad we didn't make it because if we had we'd be standing with a bunch of people with their arms raised in the air trying to capture the fireworks on their cellphones or digital cameras but elevated on the scooter there was nothing to block our view. I didn't bother bringing a camera because I was lazy and didn't feel like lugging it along and because I knew there would be at least a dozen videos posted to youtube. Here's one for anyone who missed out:



This month also marked or 2 year anniversary together! We had a quiet night and celebrated with our tradition of returning to the spot of or first date (the giant ferris wheel in Neihu). We got in one of the two new ferris wheel cars that have glass bottoms. The glass was so scuffed up it was hard to see through but thankfully the seats were clear too (unnerving when you're in a skirt). It was pretty neat. Worth the wait since it was a special night.



I have some things to write about now and Rafael has helped me modify the template so it's more photo post friendly so I'm hoping to be putting up posts or photos at least twice a week. Kick my butt if I don't, please!

Labels: New Brunswick, relationships, taipei, taiwan

1.09.2007 Happy Anniversary! to us! ya

Han and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary on Wednesday (Jan 3rd). We returned to the site of our first date. The biiiiiiig ferris wheel in Neihu. It's a pretty exciting milestone for me since this is officially now my longest relationship ever and I'm not even a little bit sick and tired of him yet. :)



He puts up and tolerates with me in a way that only a family member would and he really is my family now... not to mention he's super thoughtful and helpful all the time. Western girls, I'm telling you... find a Taiwan guy!



And there was a dorky photo booth, how could we resist?

Labels: relationships, taipei, taiwan

1.02.2007 Forgive me Wally Gator!

Well it's extremely embarrassing that I haven't posted anything in nearly two months. I guess for the most part I've been so busy with work and life that the site has fallen by the wayside. For awhile I was getting tired of all the work I was putting in here as a means of communicating with loved ones and getting little to nothing back in return... ie one way communication... but the site has taken on a life of its own and even with my sporadic posting I am still managing an average of 50+ unique visitors a day. With all the people out there in the world doing this I'm really happy that there are that many people finding me.

Anyway... new years eve in Taipei. We decided to lay low. Last year I saw the fireworks from a friend's rooftop apartment which was great... this time I didn't have a friend with a rooftop apartment that had a good view, or who wasn't going down into the trenches. The fireworks, for those outside Taiwan, are set off from Taipei 101 (the tallest building in the world). It's usually a pretty good show and my sources touted that this one was going to be "LIKE SIX TIMES BETTER THAN LAST YEAR!!!". Last year was pretty cool, so I figured it was still worth the trip out. I really didn't want to go down into the heart of the madness so I figured we could find a place to see the fireworks from a safe distance since you can see 101 from soooo many places in Taipei.

Before our adventure to find our prime fireworks viewing spot Han and I stopped for some BBQ on Minsheng East Road. Alligator was on the menu so we did it! I'm sorry Wally Gator. Forgive me. There were the typical Taiwan entries like chicken heart, pig intestines, pig face meat (not sure the tech term for that one), shaved rib bones, and cow tongue. The biggest surprise is cow tongue is amazing. Alligator tasted a lot like flounder but obviously more chewy and thicker but it was pretty tasty. It's been a long while since I've "tried something new".



Anyway I didn't bother taking video of the fireworks since I knew there'd be 50 kazillion videos of them on youtube but we did manage to get a good view, unfortunately we still got way too far into the mess of people and didn't even manage to get in the door until after 3:00 am even though we left right after the fireworks. The MRT (subway) was a nightmare with the security guards only letting small streams of people in meanwhile the "waiting area" was like a mosh pit with heavy winter jackets, and no air conditioning.

When we finally got down to the train they were pulling people out of the cars who'd fainted inside because of how many people they were packing in each car. If it hadn't been for Han creating a barrier around me I'm sure I'd have a collapsed lung. I can't believe how many people live in this city.

Labels: gastronomical adventures, taipei, taiwan

11.06.2006 I hacked my hair off

Ok so this is incredibly old news for anyone who keeps in touch with me but my hair is gone. I pretty much hadn't cut my hair, except for trims, in 10 years (I'm getting old) but during emotional lows in the summer I kept getting the temptation to hack it all off on a whim.

So one night with Meg...before she left, after sushi I think, the urge hit me again. Except it was late at night... and I was sure no place would be open.... but we got home and Meg agreed to go back out with me and check. We tried a couple places but most of them were closing up. We found one that had a great book outside showcasing hairstyles so we decided to try it out. Ironically it's one that Han suggested that I turned my nose up at because the recommendation came from his uncle. No offense to any uncles reading this (including my own) but who is going to take hair advice from an uncle?



The place was pretty much empty when we got in there which lead to another anxiety, do people really give good haircuts at the end of their shifts? I was treated like a princess regardless. The place had individual flat screen tvs at each of the hair cutting chairs and I got the longest shampoo of my life...I think 3 shampoo applications that were followed by a 5 minute scalp massage each. My next anxiety came when I assessed my hairdresser. I was kind of hoping to get one that had some funk to them... typically Taiwanese hairdressers are pretty funky... but she was just a little to GAP or NET for my taste...even if she was the sweetest thing ever! ... but the more I looked at her I realized she had a perfectly balanced look that suited her personality, so if she's able to create that for herself then maybe I would be ok.



The next snag was the complete language barrier. I was trying to use body language and hand motions to give her free reign over my hair and to let her know I was bored with it. She seemed to get the hint and then a lovely stranger... a handsome middle-aged Taiwanese man sitting beside me... translated and filled in the blanks.



So of course the first thing I did when I got home was snap a bunch of photos. Of course I can never get it this perfect on my own but I don't own a hairdryer which is one big problem but even on my hair's worse day it still is looking pretty great I think. It's kind of got the Taiwanese style mullet factor with the long pieces in the back and much shorter layers in the front, with the fro of curls (since my hair isn't so heavy anymore my natural curls have been unleashed).



Also, a before and after shot from Thailand in Feb and when I got my hair cut in August. Amazingly I didn't cry and haven't cried... and I haven't mourned my hair at all like the last time I hacked it off (grade 10??). My hair had become such a part of my identity I didn't know how devastating it was going to be to loose it. I have no heart break when I look at pictures of how long my hair was. Plus my hair grows incredibly fast so I have that security.

Labels: taipei, taiwan

10.11.2006 Moon Festival BBQ for Two (video)

Labels: relationships, taipei, taiwan, Video

8.08.2006 Bopha, Maria, and Saomai, oh my!

I remember as a kid going to bed the night before a big snow storm and just waiting for my mom to come into my room in the morning to tell me what the radio said. If there was no school I would do a dance on my bed and then go back to sleep for a few hours.

If there was school my heart was broken and I was sure it was all my teachers' fault somehow. I never dreamt that they were probably waiting as anxiously to find out whether or not they would have the day off.

Now I'm a teacher but still that little girl.... I have been checking the net obsessively trying to find out whether or not I'll get a day off school. This year has been pretty tame for Taiwan as far as typhoons. Last year I remember having 3 or 4 days off school.

Now we have a triple threat coming. The odds are good! My co-teachers have been saying we may get a few days off school. Do you think I can teach art this afternoon with my fingers crossed?

Labels: taipei, taiwan

8.07.2006 I have a Guandu problem

You'd think with hundreds of thousands of temples covering Taiwan that I'd never see the same one twice. It should be a mission to see as many as possible... but I keep getting pulled back to Guandu temple. I love this place. A couple of Sundays ago (07/30) Han and I went to Guandu. He'd never seen it before. Unfortunately, as usual, even this temple didn't seem to impress him.





















We hit the bike trail for a hike afterwards now I am convinced I need a bike. The trail is great and well organized with an actual sidewalk for pedestrians so you don't have to worry about getting mowed down by bikes. The trail itself is elevated and is beside a small road that has access to birdwatching stations. We stopped at one place and laid in the grass. Even though it was spiky and filled with bugs it was such a nice luxury to lay in grass.









The sidewalk isn't as long as the bike trail so we never got to see where the bike trail ends up but it's a decent hike.

Labels: Guandu, Guanyin, taipei, taiwan, Taiwan day trips

7.23.2006 Do youtube?

Well I like to jump on bandwagons now and then. At my current host I have the ability to stream video but I haven't had much success getting it to work yet so I've started uploading a few of the videos I have onto youtube.

It's great because it gives everyone access to my videos plus it uses their bandwidth instead of mine!

Also, it's inspiring me... I have some ideas.... hopefully I can get off my butt and work on them.

Of course the videos look a lot better on my computer since they're not compressed but I think you still can get the idea.

Let me know what you think. Check out the videos [here]

It's really interesting. Originally my intent with this website was to stay in touch and to amuse my family and friends back home and also to offer a window for people who were thinking about coming to Taiwan into Taiwan. Lately though my audience has been growing more and more and I seem to have more and more visitors from Taiwan. This is in part thanks to me being featured on Bloggers in Taiwan (thanks Andres!), to the new Taiwanfeed site, and thanks to google search + google image search. It makes me think I'm going to have to work a little harder to make my site appealing to my whole audience, and not just the one I've been thinking of so that I can keep everyone coming back.

step one: less laziness.
step two: more road trips and random bus hopping with lots of video.
step three: re-opening my eyes to the wonders around me.
step four: write, write, write, publish, publish, publish.

Labels: taipei, taiwan, Video, Wu fen pu

5.23.2006 ESL teaching: They don't know they're funny Pt.2

My older students have been crying when it comes time for Grammar class. Actually I cry when it comes to Grammar class since most of what I'm teaching them now I have to teach myself before I even teach it. It's really weird to think that we use all these rules in our day to day speech without having any knowledge of them.

Anyway, the assignment was modals. I wanted to find a way to get them motivated and even laughing so I scavenged the net for some humourous pictures. Most of them I found on ebaumsworld. I asked that the students give each person/animal in the picture advice using modals: can/could/should/why don't/ought to/had better/must/mustn't/have to.

Well this isn't so much about bad English, for the most parts my students used excellent English. It's just the advice, sometimes completely conflicting, that they gave that cracked me up. I have disguised their names using names that I think are appropriate for them. Enjoy!



Student Sunshine
To the cat: You mustn’t kiss to the dog!
To the dog: You mustn’t kit the cat or I will (drawing of an axe)!

Student Trouble
To the cat: You should run away.
To the dog: You should chase the cat.

Student Insane-laugh
To the cat: You must go always.
To the dog: You can hit it.

Student Crazy Flower
To the cat: You must run away.
To the dog: You don’t need to eat the cat.

Student Sweets
To the cat: You must run away.
To the dog: You can bit the cat.



Student Trouble
To driver one: You must stop and let him go first.
To driver two: You too!

Student Silent-but-smart
To driver one: You should have let driver 2 go first.
To driver two: You shouldn’t crash into driver 1.

Student Insane-laugh
To driver one: You shouldn’t go with car 2.
To driver two: you can tell car 1 give me dollars.

Student Sweets
To driver one: You should drive other road.
To driver two: You mustn’t drive in this road.

Student Likes-to-shut-people
To driver one: You should use grenade to throw to him.
To driver two: You must run!



Student Trouble
To the driver: You should call the manager.
To the passengers: You could scream.

Student Insane-Laugh
To the driver: You can help him to push leg.
To the passengers: You must go to back to wait train station.

Student Crazy Flower
To the driver: You shouldn’t push the train.
To the passengers: You should tell the driver to stop pushing.

Student Teach-aaa-aaa-aaa!
To the driver: You musn’t come out when the train is driving.
To the passengers: You must be carful.

Student Sweets
To the driver: You shouldn’t push the train.
To the passengers: You can go away.

Student Likes-to-shut-people
To the driver: You must stand on the middle.
To the passengers: You must use gun shut him.



Student Sunshine
To Santa: You should put the girl drow.
To the little girl: You should run now!!

Student Trouble
To Santa: You can give her some candy.
To the little girl: You can cry louder.

Student Silent-but-Smart
To Santa: Why don’t you calm the little girl down?
To the little girl: You can get down if you want.

Student Insane-Laugh
To Santa: You can make joke with her.
To the little girl: You must don’t cry.

Student Teach-aaa-aaa-aaa
To Santa: You mustn’t hug the girl.
To the little girl: You must tell the santa you are afried.

Student Sweets
To Santa: You must cry too.
To the little girl: You can hit the Santa.

To Santa: You should throw her away. (note: picture has been modified with a pencil so that the little girl has a knife up to her own neck, demonic eyes, pointy ears, and a machine gun nose sticking out of one of her sleeves.) To the little girl: You better cry louder.

Labels: ESL teaching, taipei, taiwan

5.12.2006 ai-yewwww! First Taiwan doctor experience (updated)

updated: photo added

I've had a few Taiwan hospital experiences (a medical, an infection, an allergic reaction to medication given for an infection) but I had my first doctor office experience in Taiwan this week.

I got an ear infection. I'm not sure if ear infections are catching but one of my co-workers had one, now I seem to have one.

I'm extremely uncomfortable with medical related experiences even though I spent the first half of my life visiting my sister every weekend in the IWK hospital, and the Regional. I waited probably half a week to make sure it was really an infection (smart is right). So finally once a jaw ache was added to the ache in my ear and the loss of hearing I decided it was time to see a doctor.

I asked Meg if she knew of a ear, nose and throat doctor. It happens that there is one just across the street. I made Han come because that's one of his duties as my boyfriend, and just in case there were any communication problems.

I got checked into the doctor's right away even though it was really late (like 10:30) and he saw me right away.

On first sight I nearly lost it, nearly broke into a bad giggle fit. I'd been having one of those goofy nights with Han. Laughing at everything together... when I walk in and see this little doctor who is shorter than I am (I'm about 5' 3") with one of those oldschool surgery hats on, or like the ones cafeteria workers wear, and then the classic reflective round head thing like doctors always wear in cartoons. I managed to contain myself at this point (at this point).

He sits me on an examination chair and looks into the infected ear. The first thing out of his mouth is a loud "Ai yew!!!! infection". I all but bit my tongue off to stop myself from laughing.

In Taiwan usually you hear "ai yo". I think "ai yo" and "ai yew" are two distinct phrases. "Ai yo" is usually general disgust at something. If someone annoys you, or you see something you don't want to see, or you forget something you'd hear someone exclaim "ai yo!!!". I've heard it used in an angry context too when I've made students do something when they didn't want to. "ai yew" seems to be the equivalent of "YUCK!!!!" or "GROSS!!!!!!" or "ewwwwwwwww!!!!".

So this doctor looks into my ear and exclaims "Ai yewwww! (deeply) infection".

I contained myself.

The next thing out of his mouth "You shouldn't pick your ear so much!!! (make motions with his finger in his ear).

At this point I lost composure and laughing I said "I DON'T pick my ear!!!!!"

"Yea, don't pick your ear so much. Infection, you know infection??? You have an ear infection"

"yes, I know"

:) anyway I was in and out within 15 minutes... 5 of these spent trying to convince him that I was really really sure that I was allergic to penicillin and that if he gave it to me it would make me really sick, at least 3 of these minutes trying to convince him that I wasn't an ear picker, and 5 minutes filling out a form.

Really though it was a great experience and now I'm not so nervous about seeing local doctors. I am leery that he gave me 5 pills per dosage (2 times a day)... but we'll ride it out and see how it goes.

When I came back I told Meg about the whole thing. She said she went to the same doctor about this problem she was having with her nose and he did the same thing to her. Not the "ai yew" part but he told her she shouldn't pick her nose so much. I don't know what kind of foreign girls he's seen on the streets but I can testify that I have yet to see Meg's finger up her nose. I promise to take a picture when I do.

I just can't believe a doctor who only specializes in three areas and would probably look in at least a dozen ears a day would exclaim "ai yew!" as soon as he looks in mine. I talked to one of my Taiwanese co-teachers about it who's a nursing student. Her theory is that probably his English isn't very good and he just didn't know how to express how bad it was. I don't know.... the ai yew seemed to slip out quite naturally :D

Labels: Only in Asia, taipei, taiwan

5.01.2006 deaflypmics - does this ad bug anyone else?

I have a deaf sister but I don't claim to be an expert on deafness trivia... but still... shouldn't anyone know that Vincent Van Gogh just cut off one of his ears and that he wasn't deaf? Did I miss a history lesson? Nothing I can find on the net suggests he was deaf at any point or time. I get why Beethoven is on the ad but Van Gogh????? This is in a few MRTs in Taipei.

Labels: Only in Asia, taipei, taiwan

4.29.2006 so I fell face first into a fountain tonight...

Ever have one of those moments like fate slapping you in the face saying "you made a bad decision somewhere today"? Well I had one of those in the form of a moment suitable for any light hearted comedy about girls who find awkward moments as easily as books in a bookstore.

I like being lazy on Friday nights. Pool is something I'm not very good at but doesn't take a lot of effort or thought.... at least the way I play it. So Meg, Han and I went to this great 24 hour place close to Shilin night market.

At the end of the night Meg and I were rushing to the MRT station because we were afraid we missed the last train home. We somehow ended up at the back of the Jiantian MRT station. We started hurrying around to the front.... it was raining very very hard. We saw what appeared to be a large puddle, and not being girly girls, decided to tear through it in order to make the train.

Meg was ahead of me. We ran up the steps towards the puddle and I saw her legs disappear (she's very tall).... at that moment I let out a loud screech and tried to slam my breaks on. But it's too late. One foot already plunging into the fountain, my arms flailing wildly trying to use my umbrella to somehow save myself as if it's going to break the wind like a parachute. I end up falling face first in the fountain. Submerging my whole body and half of my head.... I even had nasty fountain water go down my nose and partway down my throat. Somehow my arms didn't even end up in front of me. They were straight out like I was running to embrace the water. There is a possibility that some of it was swallowed but I'm going to pretend that didn't happen.

Gasping and still partly screaming I stand up and Meg has turned around with this "what the #$!@ is your problem??!!!!" kind of look on her face. Then at that moment she seemed to realize all of what happened and started laughing hysterically.

The next thing out of my mouth "What do we do?!!????"

My purse, of course not zipped because that would be practical, was like a water canteen filled for a small army. I turned it upside down and a big SPLOOSH of water came out. I expected to see some koi fish and seaweed swim out. The verdict still isn't out on my ipod and new cell phone. I'm scared. Meg snapped some pictures with her cell. If we can figure out how to transfer them I'll add them here.

We decided to ride the MRT home even though we looked like we spent the evening in a lagoon swimming with a swamp monster. Thankfully I had a hoodie on and hid all of my face a la Kenny from South Park. It's not like you ever see the same person twice in Taipei, but I wasn't going to risk it. I left a nice slug trail of water behind me wherever we went.

In retrospect I feel like a bigger idiot because as we were running up the steps that lead us into the fountain (of doom) I thought to myself "oh wow, look...fountain spouts". But it is really level with the ground, truly.

Meg is very happy about the whole experience. I'm waiting for the bacterial infection to set in from outdoor fountain water.

Labels: I'm a ditz, taipei, taiwan

3.29.2006 Breaking News: Maybe I don't miss home as much as I thought

Tapei, Taiwan
March 29 2006

New evidence was found early Wednesday evening on March 29th that suggests that maybe I don't miss home as much as I thought I did. While walking home from work Wednesday evening on my normal route I discovered what appears to be a genuine Reese Peanut butter cup wrapper just outside my doorway. A top notch team of professional shoppers and shopping researches have been called in to investigate the case.



Could it be true? Could there actually be Reese peanut butter cups in Taipei city??? or is there someone out there trying to torture me with the possibility????

Labels: taipei, taiwan

2.16.2006 Happy Valentine's Day.

Spent Valentine's day unexpectedly moving. A bunch of updates to come once I get a bit more settled in. Some of my New Year photography I'm really excited about. I finally found a place that does a good job developing film :)

Labels: taipei, taiwan