© 2006 Catherine. All rights reserved.

ESL teaching: They don’t know they’re funny Pt.2

My older students have been crying when it comes time for Grammar class. Actually I cry when it comes to Grammar class since most of what I’m teaching them now I have to teach myself before I even teach it. It’s really weird to think that we use all these rules in our day to day speech without having any knowledge of them.

Anyway, the assignment was modals. I wanted to find a way to get them motivated and even laughing so I scavenged the net for some humourous pictures. Most of them I found on ebaumsworld. I asked that the students give each person/animal in the picture advice using modals: can/could/should/why don’t/ought to/had better/must/mustn’t/have to.

Well this isn’t so much about bad English, for the most parts my students used excellent English. It’s just the advice, sometimes completely conflicting, that they gave that cracked me up. I have disguised their names using names that I think are appropriate for them. Enjoy!

Student Sunshine
To the cat: You mustn’t kiss to the dog!
To the dog: You mustn’t kit the cat or I will (drawing of an axe)!

Student Trouble
To the cat: You should run away.
To the dog: You should chase the cat.

Student Insane-laugh
To the cat: You must go always.
To the dog: You can hit it.

Student Crazy Flower
To the cat: You must run away.
To the dog: You don’t need to eat the cat.

Student Sweets
To the cat: You must run away.
To the dog: You can bit the cat.

Student Trouble
To driver one: You must stop and let him go first.
To driver two: You too!

Student Silent-but-smart
To driver one: You should have let driver 2 go first.
To driver two: You shouldn’t crash into driver 1.

Student Insane-laugh
To driver one: You shouldn’t go with car 2.
To driver two: you can tell car 1 give me dollars.

Student Sweets
To driver one: You should drive other road.
To driver two: You mustn’t drive in this road.

Student Likes-to-shut-people
To driver one: You should use grenade to throw to him.
To driver two: You must run!

Student Trouble
To the driver: You should call the manager.
To the passengers: You could scream.

Student Insane-Laugh
To the driver: You can help him to push leg.
To the passengers: You must go to back to wait train station.

Student Crazy Flower
To the driver: You shouldn’t push the train.
To the passengers: You should tell the driver to stop pushing.

Student Teach-aaa-aaa-aaa!
To the driver: You musn’t come out when the train is driving.
To the passengers: You must be carful.

Student Sweets
To the driver: You shouldn’t push the train.
To the passengers: You can go away.

Student Likes-to-shut-people
To the driver: You must stand on the middle.
To the passengers: You must use gun shut him.

Student Sunshine
To Santa: You should put the girl drow.
To the little girl: You should run now!!

Student Trouble
To Santa: You can give her some candy.
To the little girl: You can cry louder.

Student Silent-but-Smart
To Santa: Why don’t you calm the little girl down?
To the little girl: You can get down if you want.

Student Insane-Laugh
To Santa: You can make joke with her.
To the little girl: You must don’t cry.

Student Teach-aaa-aaa-aaa
To Santa: You mustn’t hug the girl.
To the little girl: You must tell the santa you are afried.

Student Sweets
To Santa: You must cry too.
To the little girl: You can hit the Santa.

To Santa: You should throw her away. (note: picture has been modified with a pencil so that the little girl has a knife up to her own neck, demonic eyes, pointy ears, and a machine gun nose sticking out of one of her sleeves.)
To the little girl: You better cry louder.

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